Ahmadinejad: Universal Spy?

Driving around Kauai all day yesterday taking pretty pictures, I had plenty of time to listen to a bunch of conservative radio hosts lament Iranian nutjob Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s speech to Columbia University. Rush Limbaugh noted how much the guy sounded like a traditional Democrat in his Bush bashing. Michael Medved applauded the fact that at least the university president insulted him thoroughly before he gave his speech. Laura Ingraham just seethed with overall disgust.

I think Hugh Hewitt got it right, though. He pointed out that all the Iranian people will ever see is footage of their loony leader being treated with dignity and respect. They’ll never hear the president of Columbia University say mean things about him or the harried, frustrated questioners getting increasingly irate as Ahmadinejad refused to give them a straight answer. No matter how foolish we thought he looked – and he looked foolish, indeed – the Iranian propoganda machine has plenty of material to make their guy look great.

As for me, I have a slightly different take, although I agree with most of what these hosts said. I think it’s pathetic that Columbia gave a forum to someone who is actively engaged in killing American soldiers. I think those who hide behind the idea that this is just “free speech” are deluding themselves. Where does the Constitution guarantee the right to speak at Columbia University? The hosts touched on all this, and more, and I was right there with them.

What they failed to mention, however, was how much the guy sounded like Languatron.

It’s eerie, really. Both Ahmadinejad and Languatron refuse to answer straight questions or accept simple logic. They ignore facts they don’t like. They attack their accusers, and they carry on spouting nonsense, regardless of how stupid they look. The only time Ahmadinejad gave a straight answer was when he dismissed the fact that homosexuals exist in Iran. It was straight out of the Languatron playbook, which assures us that everyone on the Internet works for Universal Studios. Both of these guys live in a fantasy world, and they’re very comfortable there. Nothing real people say can jostle them into coherence. The difference, of course, is that Ahmadinejad is developing nukes. And lunatics with nukes makes for a bad scene.

That’s why I think the U.N. should preemptively sanction Languatron, purely as a precautionary measure, before he gets his hands on any plutonium. You never know when one of these wackos will start to get real traction.

And I hear Languatron's scheduled to speak at NYU on Thursday.