Giving "Christmas Shoes" the Boot
Imagine I'm standing in line and some filthy urchin sings the following song to me:
Sir, I want to buy these shoes for my Mama, please
It's Christmas Eve and these shoes are just her size
Could you hurry, sir, Daddy says there's not much time
You see she's been sick for quite a while
And I know these shoes would make her smile
And I want her to look beautiful if Mama meets Jesus tonight
- "Christmas Shoes" by NewSong
Here's how I would answer.
Excuse me, son, but what is your problem?
If your mother is dying tonight, why the Sam Hill aren't you at her bedside savoring your last moments together instead of standing in line at JC Penney buying shoes? And if she's bedridden, what does she need your stupid shoes for? And do you really think when she kicks the bucket, Jesus is going to look down on her corpse and say "Whoa! Nice shoes!"
I'm not a very sentimental fellow.
Excuse me, son, but what is your problem?
If your mother is dying tonight, why the Sam Hill aren't you at her bedside savoring your last moments together instead of standing in line at JC Penney buying shoes? And if she's bedridden, what does she need your stupid shoes for? And do you really think when she kicks the bucket, Jesus is going to look down on her corpse and say "Whoa! Nice shoes!"
I'm not a very sentimental fellow.
posted by Elder Samuel Bennett | 6:38 PM
5 Comments:
Abbey Road showed us that dead people don't wear shoes.
Symbolism, Stallion, find the inner symbolism.
The shoes could represent, you know, like, medicine, and he needs it to save her. But he can't "say" medicine because he's getting it illegally becuase it's medicinal pot and so he has to call it "shoes".
You have to read between the lines.
I'll make sure Mrs. Stallion knows you want to be barefoot when you kick the bucket.
Shoes are important, especially when talking to women. That's all they talk about, when they're not talking about the temperature, or mega-sales at the Mall, or who's stabbing who in the back at work, or relationships, or...
AMEN! If I have to hear that song one more time I may just rip the radio out of the car and fling it at a pedestrian. No, maybe not.
But it's a stupid song.
And I am a woman & I could care less about shoes.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home