Government Funded Cheese
It's 5:30 in the morning DC time - 3:30 by my internal Utah clock - and I'm off to catch a plane. I had a great time yesterday figuring out how to spend your money. I'll tell you all about it when I get back to the West. In the meantime, enjoy and/or suffer through another excerpt from An Evening with Stallion Cornell.
______________________
From Act VIII of Cumquats on the Water
WOMAN
(A strange fellow is playing the guitar in the corner.)
Play on, minstrel! Oh, play on!
Play the tunes of a days gone by, when the men were free and the boys loved ... loved...
Oh, dammit, minstrel, the boys never loved me! Never! Sure, if I paid them, they'd wash my car - but I could wash it myself! Yes, yes, I know -- I never did!
Oh, my filthy, filthy car! It reminds me of those precious moments strumming the guitar with minstrels of all ethnic persuasions - minstrels who would wander the streets of Paris like ducks in a tree. Minstrels who would offer me a guitar - a silver guitar -a golden lute -- in exchange for my IMMORTAL SOUL!! Think of it -hellfire awaits if I but pluck a single golden string. Well, I ain't that plucky! But if I had to - I would, now. Just for a moment of music to soothe my buttocks one more time - if only - if only - Minstrel, what guitar playeth thou? Hey minstrel - that's MY GUITAR! My guitar of gold! Give it to me! (She waits for him to hand over the guitar. He doesn't.) My guitar, my good minstrel! (Still no response.) Am I damned forever for the minstrel's gold that shall never touch my soul? Truly Beelzebub waits with shiny teeth to rip my spirit raw! Is there no joy in Mudville?
(She begins to sob uncontrollably. The minstrel stops playing, walks over, and silently hands her a harmonica.) What is this? Pray, dear muses above, what measly crumbs do you throw me to appease my anguish? (She blows a few notes, and starts to smile.) This is the music - MY music! Now I know why fate has left my car so dirty!
MINSTREL
Yes, my dear, but the price for your pretty little tune is your pretty little soul.
WOMAN
I knew that. Somehow (trying her best not to sob) I always knew.
(She collapses and melts as the minstrel explodes.)
______________________
From Act VIII of Cumquats on the Water
WOMAN
(A strange fellow is playing the guitar in the corner.)
Play on, minstrel! Oh, play on!
Play the tunes of a days gone by, when the men were free and the boys loved ... loved...
Oh, dammit, minstrel, the boys never loved me! Never! Sure, if I paid them, they'd wash my car - but I could wash it myself! Yes, yes, I know -- I never did!
Oh, my filthy, filthy car! It reminds me of those precious moments strumming the guitar with minstrels of all ethnic persuasions - minstrels who would wander the streets of Paris like ducks in a tree. Minstrels who would offer me a guitar - a silver guitar -a golden lute -- in exchange for my IMMORTAL SOUL!! Think of it -hellfire awaits if I but pluck a single golden string. Well, I ain't that plucky! But if I had to - I would, now. Just for a moment of music to soothe my buttocks one more time - if only - if only - Minstrel, what guitar playeth thou? Hey minstrel - that's MY GUITAR! My guitar of gold! Give it to me! (She waits for him to hand over the guitar. He doesn't.) My guitar, my good minstrel! (Still no response.) Am I damned forever for the minstrel's gold that shall never touch my soul? Truly Beelzebub waits with shiny teeth to rip my spirit raw! Is there no joy in Mudville?
(She begins to sob uncontrollably. The minstrel stops playing, walks over, and silently hands her a harmonica.) What is this? Pray, dear muses above, what measly crumbs do you throw me to appease my anguish? (She blows a few notes, and starts to smile.) This is the music - MY music! Now I know why fate has left my car so dirty!
MINSTREL
Yes, my dear, but the price for your pretty little tune is your pretty little soul.
WOMAN
I knew that. Somehow (trying her best not to sob) I always knew.
(She collapses and melts as the minstrel explodes.)
posted by Elder Samuel Bennett | 2:41 AM
2 Comments:
I hope you funded this magnificent masterpiece.
I wish!
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