Aspen Grove Report

I have returned! And I’m sick and exhausted.

This year’s Aspen Grove jaunt was far more difficult than many in year’s past, because at one time or another, every single member of the family was ill. Three-year-old Stalliondo also decided he was incapable of mobility on his own, and insisted on riding on my shoulders everywhere he went. That was fun at first, but it ended up doing interesting things to my back. The family still hasn’t really recovered, and I, myself, am now struggling with the effects of a nasty, nasty cold. I could whine more if you like, complete with mucous descriptions. Let me know.

Still, I kept my word to my wife, and I didn’t touch the computer the entire week we were gone. It was startlingly easy, really. The world is a much more cheerful place when you don’t read screeching headlines on a daily basis.

What to say about the vacation itself? Well, Aspen Grove is becoming more and more like a traditional resort getaway, which is a bad thing. In my childhood, it was exceedingly rustic, and now they’ve built a massive new abomination called the Beckham Lodge to replace a lot of the funky old A-frame cabins that we’ve grown to love. The lodge sits directly in front of the mountain view from the center of the camp, and it’s not nearly as nice to look at. The lights from the thing stay on 24 hours a day, which results in unnecessary light pollution when the sun goes down. This monstrosity even has an elevator and a garage.

It’s civilized! Blech.

We still stayed in the cabins, but the writing is on the wall that said cabins are not long for this world. Nobody’s seriously considering abandoning the annual Aspen Grove retreat, but if the cabins disappear altogether, the rumblings of discontent might start getting louder.

That’s not to say that it wasn’t fun. It’s always a blast to see all my siblings, cousins, and extended family from hither and yon. I also read a good book – Ilium by Dan Simmons – and snuck out of camp and saw a fun movie – Mamma Mia, which was much better than I expected. I’ll review both in forthcoming blog posts. I also hiked and swam and unsuccessfully fished. I tried to play paintball, but we got to the paintball site five minutes late and the Nazi running the thing refused to let us participate. I told him “Up your nose with a rubber hose.” It felt good. I also sang my Ammon Song live for the first time at the talent show, accompanying myself on both guitar and harmonica. Siblings have threatened to put it up on YouTube. If that happens, I’ll embed the thing here on the blog.

Perhaps the most fun were the nightly games of Time’s Up, held in My Fiancee’s cabin. I discovered that my brother-in-law thinks Pierce Brosnan is the lead singer of The Who, and that my sister thinks Squanto had bowel issues. The women always bested the men in the competition, despite our feeble efforts to cheat.

All in all, a good time. But I really need a vacation to recuperate from the effects of my last vacation.